No, I’m not OK… 

I’m tired of the word O.K.

We hand it about so often that it’s become a nothing word.

It has no meaning.

No substance.

Often we use it because we think we should. 

It’s up there with the sentence “I’m fine”.

It’s polite, it’s expected, it’s crap.

You know what , it’s actually ok not to be ok.

To feel upset, angry, hurt. 

You don’t have to be ok. 

“You look tired is everything alright “?

“I’m ok” No you are not you have been up all night with children and are surviving on caffeine, you are tired and exhausted. You are not ok.

I heard you have lost your job, you ok?

“I’m ok” no you are not you are worried about paying bills finding money for the kids new school uniform. You are feeling rejected and confused. 

“I heard what that woman said to you, are you ok?”

“I’m ok” No You are raging she embarrassed you for no reason other than pure rudeness. You are angry and hurt.

Why do we say I’m ok when it’s obvious we aren’t and why do others take it knowing that we are not? 

Is it politeness?

Is it a fear about getting involved?

Or a general don’t really care ? 

Maybe all of the above, I don’t know but I want to banish I’m ok. 

I’m challenging people today to be open and say “you know what today is hard I’m struggling”. Or even “I’m feeling fantastic today is a good day”.

I also want you to challenge others “I’m ok” when it’s obvious they are not. “Can I help” or simply “I’m here for you”. Could seriously make someone feel less alone. 

Because “I’m ok” can destroy you, it can leave you feeling so isolated . It can make you question yourself and drive yourself crazy ” why aren’t I ok” ? “What did I do wrong? Why do I feel this way?

When the truth is our emotions are part of who we are. We feel, we laugh we cry. We know joy and we know sadness. 

Our emotions are our humanity. 

By pretending we are ok we don’t allow ourselves to validate our hearts. 

Let’s leave the polite bullshit behind and be open and honest. 

Let’s share how we really are feeling today. 

Let’s be be vulnerable. 

Let’s be transparent,

Let’s be true.

No, I’m not ok… 

Weight of the world

I’m so very tired, yet I’m struggling to sleep. I have no reason for this insomnia beyond the normality of my life.

Do you ever have times when you feel anxious and stressed, but cannot actually pin point the reason behind these feelings? That’s how I’m feeling right now.

My stomach is giving me trouble, headaches a plenty and my memory well I forgot where I left that.

I don’t understand what’s going on, maybe it’s just a bad week with my illness but the truth is I’m actually ok pain wise. Crazy right!

I’m loving having the children off school, even if I confess it is constant.

I wonder if it’s the dismay I feel from the world around me. The riots really shook me. The news is full of horror stories, neglect and selfishness.

Sometimes being part of this world brings me down. I dream of the fairytale land where families are united and friends are true. Where people like to work, learn and respect life and others around them.

I know that world is only in my dreams, human nature doesn’t allow for this to happen, greed, envy will always get in the way.

The truth is I just need to learn how to protect myself from it. Hide in my own bubble, staying true to who I am. It’s not easy. I just want everyone to be happy and content.

I was told today I look like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders and that’s exactly how I feel.

I need ideas to help me lower my anxiety and stress and I need to learn how to let go of the things I have no control over.

Any suggestions????