Would It change what I believe? 

As I placed my lottery this weekend I was wondering about what I would do if I won the jackpot. A dream i’m sure we all have had at one time or another. I was wondering if being a millionaire would change my political view point. 

It’s easy I guess to say tax the wealthy when you are poor. Would my view be the same if I was one of the elite?

I didn’t have to think about it that long because I truly think my answer would be no.

I don’t think my viewpoint would change.

You see no amount of money can replace my compassion or my empathy.

But most of all money couldn’t replace my need to feel part of something.

You see we have all been sold the lie that being individualistic is the only way to live. To only think about oneself and our own wants and needs. But this only leads to one thing loneliness. 

The consumerism lie that things can make you happy has been pushed down our throats way to long.

Yet the truth is far from it. 

The newest model phone can be fun, but will it hug you close as you fall asleep?

That gorgeous designer handbag will look good on your arm but will it laugh out loud at your stupid jokes or wipe away your tears when you are sad?

Community and relationships are the greatest of things and money cannot buy them. 

Having money won’t stop me loving on children who have no place to call home.

Stop me fighting for services and support for my friends who are either disabled or raising disabled children.

Having a full bank account will not stop me encouraging those who need support or guidance. 

I’m not going to lie and say winning the lottery wouldn’t be amazing. My adapted home on a farm depends on it. 

Yet whilst the money would make life easier it wouldn’t make me complete.

It’s my, family, friends and passions that do this. 

   

There is hope.

What a week and its only Wednesday!

I feel as if I have been living a lifetime over these last few days.

I have witnesses some of life’s incredible beauty but also some of life’s devastating darkness.

Wearing my heart on my sleeve often leaves me vulnerable.

My openness to love at all times has also left me exposed for negativity and pain.

 

Still I see life as a gift, a privilege.

So its from this perspective I want to say this.

 

Remember that everyone of us has their own pathway to walk.

Sometimes that path will lead to cross roads,roundabouts and dead-ends.

No one will ever really understand the journey of another.

Shared experiences can and will be different.

Determined by the understanding of the personal heart and mind.

We have to embrace our differences and celebrate each other for who they are.

Live life lifting people up.

Not tearing them down.

 

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As human’s we need to socialise, we need to bond and form relationships.

Its the essence of our humanity.

But sometimes its these very relationships that can lead to the destruction of the human psyche.

 

Having someone in your life is a honour.

The value of a friend is priceless.

The gift of a child.

The love of a partner.

Your heart feels alive with the joy of connection.

 

But honour comes with responsibility.

The commitment should always be about being the light in the life of another.

Be the best friend you can possibly be.

Strive to be the greatest of parents.

The most attentive of partners.

 

Yet lets take this dedication and commitment one step further.

Smile at people on your train.

Thank you barista for their service.

Hold the door for the one behind you.

Accept the point of view of another.

Forgive your enemies.

 

The world is simply falling apart.

The media is full of the horror that is happening in our world today.

War, terrorism, genocide,

Illness, diseases and death.

But we do have hope.

 

That hope is found in our essence of connection.

As I said before its not always easy wearing my heart on my sleeve.

But it gives me freedom.

Freedom to hope

Freedom to have faith.

Faith that compassion and empathy will win the battle of hearts.

That indifference and hate will lose.

 

Because if as human beings we honour and respect each other.

Our spirits our humanity will over come all.

 

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Empathy

em·pa·thy
[em-puh-thee]
– noun 1. identification with the feelings of another

How many times have we read birth stories and cringed with reminders of the pain.

Felt the tiredness of a new mother.

A parents nerves on the first day of school.

We have all at one time felt empathy for someone.

Today I was reminded that I could emphasise with another on the lost of her daughter. The pain no body ever wants to face. The loss of a child rips at your soul. Changing you to the very core. You are not person you was five minutes before. You can never go back to that place. You are a grieving parent. The life role nobody ever wants to play.

Birthday parties, proms, graduations, weddings these we wish to plan not our child’s funeral. This isn’t fair, this isn’t how life is supposed to be.

How do I look this grieving parent in the face and say “everything will be ok”. I don’t know what ok is anymore. I know I have reached a place of survival a place where I accept life goes on. Yet the smile still never reaches my eyes.

I still haven’t worked out why the rest of the world carries on when inside I feel like it has stopped.

I still have moments where the tears fall unexpectedly. Times when the remembering overwhelms me. Her smile, her giggle her smell.

Does time ease your pain? I don’t know, some say the rawness eases of but for me there are days where I’m transported back into the agony of that fateful day.

Do you move on? The truth is we have no choice as the world turns on it’s axis the days become nights the weeks turn into months. We can’t stay still even if we desire to.

I have learned to laugh again. I see the joy in life once more. I embrace the future as what is yet to be. But the truth be told part of me is forever in 2008 that piece of my heart that will be forever with my daughter.

Will I be whole again, not anytime soon. I just hold on tight for eternity.

As for empathy it hurts. Knowing the pain my fellow grieving parent is feeling destroys me. It’s the pain you wish on nobody. My only words to share are these “don’t try to cope, just survive”.

I haven’t coped but I have survived.

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