This weekend I sincerely fell apart, my tears fell and my heart broke a little more.

But this is ok.

Because falling apart allows you to put yourself back together.

In the brokeness you can find your truth.

Grief is a shit there is no doubt about that but this weekend in the midst of my grief I felt joy.

How crazy is that?

Loving is scary, there is always the thought that your heart could get broken

But not loving is really not living.

So in the my midst of pain I will hold on to the joy.

The amazing incredible joy I feel when I think of my beautiful girl.

The joy of knowing how blessed I was to love this child.

The blessing I have being a mom to four amazing girls and two incredible boys.

So right now whatever pain you are facing or whatever fear is tearing at your heart, hold on to your joy.

For it is said ….

‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Alfred Lord Tennyson